


The Legend of the Pied Piper

by kitkatt0430



Series: The Legendary Hartley Rathaway [1]
Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Gen, Hartley has basically adopted Jax as his little brother, Hartley is such a flirt, Hartley is thirsty for Mick, Hartley joins the Legends, Hartley wants all the best things for Jax, Hartley's been watching scifi with Gideon in the time vault, Hartley's been working at STAR Labs, Humor, Jax is his intern, M/M, Mick is so amused by this turn of events, Pre-Slash, Stein doesn't drug Jax, Team Flash is actually helping Jax with the financial situation, and playing chess, because I hated that, because he needed a decent chess partner, both Gideons are being sneaky and planning something, even though Mick's reaction to it was hilarious, protective Hartley
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-14
Updated: 2019-12-14
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:28:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21636625
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kitkatt0430/pseuds/kitkatt0430
Summary: When Rip Hunter kidnapped Martin Stein and Jax Jackson to offer them a place on his crew, he made a slight miscalculation.  He did not consider it relevant that Jax was a STAR Labs intern.  Hartley Rathaway does not like it when people mess with his interns.
Relationships: Hartley Rathaway/Mick Rory
Series: The Legendary Hartley Rathaway [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1559584
Comments: 7
Kudos: 63





	The Legend of the Pied Piper

"Uh, while you were incapacitated, I may have tampered with your weapons," the British kidnapper said, right as a sonic blast from his left sent him skidding across the top of the building.

"Guess its a good thing I'm here, then," Hartley snarked, walking out of the roof access doorway with his gloved hands raised and a smirk on his face beneath the Piper goggles. Once Jax and Stein had gone off comms, Hartley'd paused just long enough to signal a problem to Barry before suiting up and tracking down their last known location which, luck would have it, wasn't far from the building they were now standing on. Barry'd been distracted by yet another one of Zoom's lackeys, so it seemed that today was a day for the Pied Piper to come to the rescue.

So much for a quiet night of rest and relaxation for the A team while the B team kept Central City safe.

"Who the hell are you?" British and angry demanded, getting to his feet and going for some kind of gun at his side. It looked retro, but that was no guarantee it was what it appeared to be, considering he'd managed to kidnap eight of the biggest bad-asses Hartley knew... well, seven of the biggest bad-asses and Professor Stein, but who's counting?

"Pied Piper," Hartley responded cheerfully. "You kidnapped my intern. That really annoys me."

Stein cleared his throat.

"You kidnapped Professor Stein too, that... moderately annoys me too, I guess." Hartley allowed, smirking when the Professor scowled at him.

"The Pied Piper," the British Firefly extra muttered to himself, brown coat flaring dramatically in the wind. "Hartley Rathaway. You're... working for STAR Labs? Not one of the Flash's nemesis?"

"Well there was something of a kerfluffle at first and I might have tried to kill him, there's some ambiguity there. But it's all water under the bridge these days. The Flash is a bit of a bleeding heart that way." There was never going to be a 'Pied Piper Saves Central City' headline, but Hartley was fine with that. He wasn't really cut out to be a hero, though he'd take obnoxious occasional side kick and tech guy and call it a win. "Anyway," he glanced a the nearest person... Mick Rory, who was definitely hotter in person, "I missed the part where the dude gave his name. I was still picking the lock on the access. What's this asshole called?"

"Rip Hunter," Mick responded, amused smirk on his face.

"Right, Rip. Thanks, Rory." Hartley turned back to Hunter. "So, you get to tell me why you kidnapped my intern or I knock you off the building this time. The Atom is probably fast enough to reach you before you hit the ground, but I'd advise getting to the point if I were you."

Hunter made an irritated sound and, honestly, Hartley wouldn't have been surprised if they guy had stamped his foot in irritation. But he did, at least, start talking again. "The future of the world is in peril because of a man by the name of Vandal Savage."

"That's impossible," Carter interjected. "We destroyed him."

"The Green Arrow, the Flash, and Piper here helped us do it," Kendra agreed.

"And therein lay the problem," Rip said, but he was giving Hartley an incredulous look.

Hartley was trying - and probably failing - not to preen. He'd only played a minor part in the plan to take out Savage and spent more time than was advisable making sarcastic commentary about what kind of moron hands over a literal league of assassins to a known genocidal maniac for his own good. (Hartley and Oliver weren't exactly on great terms these days.) But it was nice to have his part remembered and commented on positively.

"Unless you or Mr. Hall deliver the death blow, Savage can be restored from but a single cell."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Mick Rory demanded.

"Cliff notes version is that Vandal Savage is an overly dramatic immortal with aspirations of world domination that he's been failing at since the time of the Pharaohs, largely because he's obsessed with those two," Hartley gestured to Kendra and Carter, "who reincarnate when they die. He's a stalker with a crush for her but mostly just likes killing them both over and over."

"Accurate," Kendra admitted while Carter shrugged.

"And what does any of that have to do with us?" Snart demanded.

"In the year 2166, Vandal Savage uses the power he's amassed over his long life to finally conquer the world. I've been tasked with assembling an elite team to stop him."

Well, that was a lie. Hartley could hear the man's pulse stutter over the last sentence where it'd been perfectly steady for everything else. For now, he decided not to call the man on it.

"Yeah, how's that?" Sara asked.

"To travel through time," Rip elaborated. "To capture Savage before he grows into the monster he becomes."

"You nabbed the wrong guy," Snart said derisively. "Hero ain't on my resume."

"Mine either," Mick agreed.

"I know its difficult for you to fathom, but where... when I'm from, you and everyone on this roof aren't just considered heroes... you're legends."

"Except for me, I suppose. Didn't even know I play for Team Flash," Hartley muttered, a touch petulantly.

"Legends..." Ray echoed and, oh, the poor sucker was hooked already, wasn't he?

"I, uh... I hate to nitpick, but doesn't a legend have to be dead?" Stein asked.

Jax nodded. "That's a deal breaker for me, so I'm gonna have to pass."

"Admittedly, by the year 2166 we'd all be dead no matter how long a life we live..." Ray mused. Oh, yeah, definitely hooked.

"It's dangerous for any of you to know too much about your own futures, but I am here because each of you is destined for greatness. And because if I can't procure help for my cause... this is what the world will look like one-hundred fifty years from now." He lit up a holographic projector. 

And... okay, the future looked horrific. Central City was on fire. There was no sound, though at this point all there would've been left to hear would be the roaring of the flames. The screaming would've been long over. Hartley might be a sarcastic asshole, but he was an empathetic sarcastic asshole. Usually. And this... hell, even he wanted to stop this from happening.

"I could have chosen any time and any place. Of all the people who ever lived, I chose you eight. Though I certainly wouldn't object to your help was well, Dr. Rathaway." Rip held out a card as he headed towards the exit. Handing it over to Stein, he added, "I hope to see all of you at this address in thirty-six hours."

Jax waited just long enough for the door to shut before asking, "okay, Hartley, how much of that was a lie?"

"Eh, most of it he was telling the truth about, but he was totally lying about the legends thing. And I'm pretty sure he doesn't have permission for any of this..." Hartley pulled off his goggles and put on his glasses, letting his hood fall back. Seeing the looks on the thieves faces, he shrugged. "You've already got my name and, quite frankly, if you're thinking I'm worth money to my wealthy parents, consider for a moment that they're exceedingly homophobic and I'm extremely gay."

"Name sounds familiar," Mick allowed.

"You burned the extremely pricey Fire and Ice artwork they owned about a year ago? Posted the video of its destruction on Youtube. I may have downloaded a copy; cheers me up on bad days," Hartley responded glibly. 

"Fire's good for that." Mick grinned.

Hartley tilted his head to the side consideringly and wondered what the odds were he'd get laid if both he and Mick Rory went along for this doomed time traveling trip. Because Mick was just the right size for Hartley to really enjoy sitting on his lap. Hartley licked his lips and wished he could tell in this light if Mick's eyes were following the motion or not.

"Well, you might as well pass the address around, Professor," Ray spoke up. "I hope I'll see you all there when the time comes."

* * *

"Gideon, I need all the information you can give me on one Dr. Hartley Rathaway. Alias, the Pied Piper." Rip was not pleased to have been taken off guard like that, but he hadn't really had much of a choice about extending the invitation to the unknown like that. Rathaway wasn't completely unheard of when Rip was from. What little Rip remembered about the Pied Piper when reading up on the Flash when he'd first met Barry Allen, some twenty years in the future, was that the Piper was an erstwhile enemy of Allen's who eventually became a sometimes ally of Wally West. In fact... at this point in time, Rathaway should've been one of Snart's Rogues. If Rathaway was there to rescue anyone, it should have been the two criminals.

Instead he'd called Jackson his intern.

"Information regarding Dr. Hartley Rathaway was classified by my creator, Dr. Barry Allen," Gideon responded after a moment of hesitation. "The most I can tell you is that he's a current ally of the Flash, working at STAR Labs as a physicist. He's necessary to the time line and is required to help save the Flash's life after the Flash attracts the attention of a Time Wraith several months from now."

Rip swore. He'd picked the eight members of his team for the fact that they were expendable. Ray Palmer would die a second, final time during Hive's attack later that year after Laurel Lance died. Sara Lance rejoined the League of Shadows after helping Nyssa Al Ghul retake it, but it was a role that Thea Queen would easily enough slide into if Sara wasn't there. Snart was well known for indulging in instances of enemy-mine with the Flash, but nothing integral to the timeline and Rory was a footnote compared to his partner. If Saunders or Hall died, there were other versions of them Hunter could recruit. And Stein and Jackson would be killed by Zoom trying to protect the Flash, an attempt that would be in vain. 

But Hartley Rathaway was necessary to the timeline. And Rip had just offered him a chance to join the Waverider's crew. A spot on a suicide mission, if things didn't go well.

Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck.

"Gideon. I think I may have made a mistake tonight."

* * *

Sitting in STAR Labs with Jax and Stein, Hartley propped his feet up and blissfully inhaled the steam from his tea. Then he stirred in a packet of stevia and cautiously took a sip. Still too hot.

"You can't keep ignoring me, Hartley," Stein fumed. "Your behavior is quite childish."

"I'm not ignoring you, Professor. I just had more important things on my mind." Hartley smiled thinly. They argued over physics theories earlier in the day and Hartley was provably right, but Stein had refused to admit it. So was Hartley being petty about it now? Well... yes. That was what Hartley did when people annoyed him. Pettiness and passive aggressiveness. But he supposed enough was enough and it was time to let up.

"Like your tea?" Stein pouted.

"It's good tea," Hartley responded. "You should try it."

Jax was drinking a cup of tea of his own. "It's actually really good."

"I'll stick with my coffee," Stein replied wryly. "So. What are we going to do about Rip Hunter's offer? What he said about Vandal Savage conquering the world..."

"It's 150 years away, so arguably the best course of action would be to track down Malcolm and repeatedly punch him in the face for doing exactly what I warned Oliver he'd do. Namely stab us in the back." Hartley took another drink of his tea and willed it to calm him down.

"We don't know for sure that Malcolm Merlyn helped resurrect Vandal Savage," Stein objected.

"But we've got every reason to believe he did it," Jax countered. "May not have met the guy myself, but it fits the dude's MO from everything we've heard."

Stein conceded with an inelegant shrug.

"And after we're done punching Merlyn in the face?" Jax asked Hartley.

"Track down Savage where ever he's gone to ground to recover, have Kendra stab him with every ancient Egyptian artifact Snart can steal for us, and hope eventually one of those will kill him deader than dead." Hartley shrugged. "But I gotta admit... I really want to time travel. It's been my dream since watching _Doctor Who_ reruns on late night television on PBS."

"I would love to time travel as well," Stein sighed.

"Yeah, well, I'm not so keen on this whole time travel thing." Jax shook his head when they looked at him. "Never had the scifi bug as a kid. My mom wanted me to go to college so I'd be the first person in our family to do it and the best way to do that was sports."

Hartley hummed thoughtfully. "Do you even want your physics bachelor?" They were helping Jax get set up to start college the next year, but Jax's mom was the one who was actually enthusaistic about him going. Jax himself...

"I don't know. I like being a mechanic, working with cars. Maybe I should be going for mechanical engineering."

"Cisco'd love that. But, Jax? What do you want?" Hartley gave him a long look. "Not going to college is a valid decision too, you know." Hartley steam rolled right past Stein's affronted clearing of the throat. "If you really enjoy being a mechanic there are vocational education programs you can go through to be officially certified and that'd certainly look good on your resume." Right now the younger man was working part time at the same auto shop where he'd been working when Hartley and Caitlin first approached him to help Stein. But he was also officially working part time at STAR Labs too, as a paid intern. "You could be a mechanic who does physics for a hobby, a physicist who does mechanics for a hobby, or anything else you want to do with your life. You deserve the chance to have the life and career that make you happy, Jax, not one dictated by circumstances or what you think other people want for you."

"Hartley's right," Stein agreed quietly. "I know I can be rather pushy about this, but... you should go into a career you enjoy. I do hope I haven't been too pushy with you."

"Nah, Gray, you've been alright." Jax twiddled his thumbs. "We should talk this over with Cisco, Caitlin, and Barry before making a decision about this time travel thing. My future career choices can get figured out later."

"And... I think we should consult Gideon," Hartley opined.

"Who's Gideon?" Jax asked.

"She's an AI that Barry will build in the future that Eobard Thawne stole and installed in our hidden panic room. Or the time vault if you want to be melodramatic about it." Hartley grinned. "She can track the timelines, to some degree, so she can advise us about the repercussions if this goes badly for us. Plus, she's my favorite chess partner, so I should warn her I'm going on a time traveling trip with someone who may potentially be as bad at temporal steering as the Doctor is in the TARDIS."

"You play chess with a future AI," Jax muttered.

"I watched the _Terminator_ movies with her too. She wasn't impressed at first, but then she realized the series was a political allegory and liked it a lot better."

Stein just face palmed quietly.

* * *

"I can't believe you're considering this," Mick complained, taking a break from welding random shit together. (It was therapeutic and surprisingly lucrative, as he could sell it under an alias because if you called it art, there'd always be someone who'd buy it.) "We're thieves. Crooks. Criminals." He stopped with the synonyms when Len glowered at him. "We ain't heroes, Snart. And what reason have we got to care about shit that happens a hundred years after we're dead."

"He said across time, Mick," Len drawled. "What about the years before? Before fingerprints and surveillance cameras and DNA analysis..."

"Before CSI's like that twink you've been stalking got taken seriously in court?"

"I'm not stalking him," Len grumbled.

"I haven't seen you this obsessed with someone since the Flash. He even visited you in jail, from what I heard."

"It's... complicated. I'm not obsessed." Len scowled. "Besides, don't tell me your eyes weren't glued to Rathaway's ass once he showed up on that rooftop."

"I was not." It wasn't true. He was totally ogling Rathaway's ass. It was a nice ass. Very pert looking in those tight jeans.

Len snickered, well aware of the transparency of Mick's lie. Then, sighing, he sat up on the couch and looked at Mick. "Why did we become criminals?"

"Because we hate working and love money." The answer was a flippant cover for 'your father didn't give you a choice' and 'no one believed the pyromaniac didn't deliberately burn his own family to death'. They were criminals because society never gave them a chance to be anything other.

"We could steal the Mona Lisa straight off Da Vinci's easel..."

"Would it still be worth anything at that point?"

"Snatch the Hope Diamond before it was discovered," Len persevered, giving Mick a look that said if he interrupted again he'd be suffering mild frostbite. "Look, do you want a chance to have sex with Rathaway or not?"

"I'm punching the first person who calls me a hero," Mick muttered, determinedly not looking Len in the eye.

* * *

"While I cannot tell you what your future holds or what decisions to make, I am authorized to tell the three of you that the futures that arise from successful completion of Captain Hunter's mission are far preferable to the futures where he fails."

Hartley looked over at Barry and raised an eyebrow. "Would it have killed you not to make her so cagey?"

"I haven't even made her yet," Barry protested, waving his hands in frustration. 

Jax and Cisco snickered.

"So by telling us that, you're basically implying we should go," Professor Stein filled in, looking giddy at the prospect of time travel.

"I did not say that," Gideon insisted. "But I cannot control whatever inferences you did take away from my statement."

"Well I'm going," Hartley chirped, smirking to himself as he thought of Mick Rory and the prospect of possibly getting to climb that man like a tree.

"Oh no," Caitlin gave him a look. A very knowing, judgmental look. "Which one is it?"

"Which one is what?"

"The person that you are planning to seduce. What is his name, Hartley?" Caitlin crossed her arms and gave him an intense look.

Hartley gave her an innocent look. "No idea what you mean."

"Now who's being cagey?" Gideon asked.

"Oh be quiet," Hartley grumbled.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Rathaway," Gideon responded innocently. "I'm afraid I can't do that."

"Let me guess," Barry looked amused and mock offended, "you two finally got around to watching _2001: A Space Odyssey_? Without me?"

"I plead the fifth. On both conversations happening here," Hartley insisted, determinedly not looking at Barry's pouting expression. Why people thought Barry's speed was his most dangerous weapon, Hartley would never understand. Those puppy dog eyes were lethal.

"It's not Carter, because Hartley could barely stand him the last time we teamed up with him," Cisco said in an aside to Caitlin.

"And he wouldn't be avoiding the question if it were Ray," Caitlin agreed.

"It's probably not this Rip Hunter guy either since he kidnapped Jax and Professor Stein and Hartley holds unreasonable grudges," Cisco continued.

"I do not hold unreasonable grudges. My grudges are always reasonable," Hartley complained. Stein cleared his throat. "Mostly reasonable. My grudges are usually mostly reasonable."

Cisco snickered while Caitlin rolled her eyes. "Snart or Rory?" she asked.

"Could be both," Jax muttered, clearly amused by the turn that the conversation had taken.

"Oh, fuck, that'd be hot," Hartley said, unable to help himself. If Snart and Rory were into threesomes, Hartley would not say no. He'd say 'yes' and 'please' and 'harder'.

Cisco cracked up. "Leave him alone Caitlin. If he wants to seduce one of them... or both, I'm not gonna judge. Have fun, Hartley. Try to save the world if you're not too busy, okay?" By this point, Barry was giggling too and even Caitlin had a smile tugging at her lips.

"Anyway," Hartley turned to Stein and Jax. "Yay or nay?"

"Ah, well... yay." Stein's 'yay' was a little awkward, but effusive.

"I'm just... what happens to my mom if I don't come back," Jax asked, uncertain. "I'm all she's got."

"We've still got about a day before it has to be decided," Hartley told him, voice turning gentle. "Why don't you talk to her about it? See what she thinks."

"Yeah, that's... that's a good idea." Jax waved at Gideon. "It was nice meeting you."

"You as well," Gideon replied. Once Jax was out of the room, Gideon said, "Dr. Rathaway, if you truly intend to go with the Legends, there's something important you need to do first."

"What's that?" Because non-cryptic advice on the future from Gideon? Hartley was not turning that down.

"You need to teach either Cisco or Caitlin how to use your original Piper gloves. And lock them to the correct frequency."

"The Patro-no isn't going to work, is it?" Hartley's mind was whiring already; the Patro-no had seemed like a sound idea in theory, but in practice there'd been something about it that nagged at Hartley.

Gideon didn't answer, but her silence was telling enough.

Hartley turned to Stein. "You had better respect whatever decision Jax comes to, because if you force him to come along against his will, I will make your life hell. Is that clear?"

Stein nodded. "Crystal."

"So, Cisco, Caitlin, who wants a crash course in how to use Piper gloves?"

* * *

Thirty-six hours after Rip Hunter propositioned nine people on a rooftop with the prospect of time travel (one more than intended, which Rip was still having fits over), the new crew of the Waverider was gathered outside at the rendezvous point.

"Don't worry about Dr. Rathaway," Gideon had assured him earlier. "I've been able to mitigate any negative affects his leaving will have on the Flash's personal timeline with the help of the original Gideon."

But Rip was still worried. He'd have to keep a close eye on the timelines until they stabilized once the Waverider left. The last thing he wanted was to find out the Flash died before he could even create Gideon. Not that Gideon ceasing to exist would be the worst of the consequences of Barry Allen dying too soon, but those were the consequences that were the most personal to Rip. Gideon was his dearest friend; Rip couldn't bear the thought of losing her on top of the loses he'd already suffered.

But if Gideon said it'd be okay, then Rip had to trust her.

Standing on the gangplank of the cloaked Waverider, Rip took a quick headcount. Two thieves, two sacred hawks, one assassin, one genius with a super suit, the two halves of FIRESTORM, and one Dr. Hartley Rathaway. And while some of them looked eager (Professor Stein, Dr. Palmer, and Dr. Rathaway especially), most of them appeared wary... but alert. Nine in total and there were only eight new chairs on the bridge. Rip had rather hoped that Dr. Rathaway would decide not to come along after all. Now it felt like an embarrassing oversight.

"Gideon. Please prepare one more seat on the bridge for the crew."

"Of course Captain. It should be ready shortly."

"Very good." Rip sighed, readied himself, and then strode down the gangplank to greet his new crew.

* * *

"We're not quite ready for take off yet," Hunter said as he led them aboard. "The bridge had to be modified to account for the increased crew and the last of the chairs is being installed by Gideon."

"And Gideon would be?" Snart asked silkily, which was basically the tone he took at his most dangerous. Mick could understand; Rip had made it sound like he worked alone, but if he already had a crewmate...

"Oh, you've got an AI?" Rathaway piped up. "Any relation to the AI the Flash is supposed to invent in the future?"

"That's correct. The Gideon currently residing in the STAR Labs Time Vault is my progenitor," came a voice from a hidden speaker. Mick jumped, startled by the unexpected addition to the conversation. "All Time Master ships are equipped with a Gideon based AI. Most assume new names, but I was fond of the original."

"I don't suppose you enjoy chess?" Rathaway asked innocently. For some reason the Professor groaned while the kid - Jacks or something like that - snickered.

"So you're an artificial intelligence?" asked the eager puppy - Ray something or other - with the fluffy haircut.

"I prefer autonomous intelligence, but yes. I run the ship and monitor the timelines for aberrations." If Gideon controlled the ship then that meant it - she? - controlled the hot water and the food too. And the oxygen. Best to stay on her nice side, Mick decided.

"What are your preferred pronouns?" Sara asked. "Just because your voice is feminine, well... I don't want to assume."

"I do prefer she/her, though I appreciate your asking, Miss Lance."

The wannabe extras from _The Mummy_ looked confused by the AI, though only the guy looked like he might be trouble later.

"So we gonna get a tour while we're waiting or what?" Mick spoke up. 

"We have to learn the layout of our new temporary home eventually," Snart added. "What are the accommodations like? Two to a bunk?"

"Sounds cozy," Rathaway added, turning to Mick and adding, "wouldn't mind a friend to keep me warm at night." And then he winked.

Hunter choked.

Oh, yes, Mick liked this Hartley Rathaway. So much audacity in that one.

"No, that's... no." Hunter gave a little shudder at the thought. Man must be one hell of a prude. "There's enough rooms for everyone. A time ship like this has quarters for a maximum crew of twelve. Everyone will have their own bunk. Additionally, each crew quarter has a sonic shower, sink, and toilet."

"Sounds better than some of the places I stayed while part of the League," the assassin lady observed. There was something unnatural and sharp about her that kind of creeped Mick out a little, for all that he was still inclined to trust her.

"Right well then... shall we?" Hunter gestured to the side and then led the way deeper into the ship, pointing out the crew quarters.

They each picked a room by dumping suitcases and the like on the floor; Mick and Snart each packed light, but even they brought a backpack's worth of things each with them. Notably, the love birds took separate rooms, which made Hawk-Dude look cranky. Snart didn't help things with his pithy comment about trouble in paradise. Rathaway looked like he was trying not to laugh. In the background there was an attempt by Haircut to see if the Professor remembered teaching him, but that got shut down pretty fast. Mick almost felt sorry for the kicked puppy. Almost.

Once the ten cent tour was over, they were taken to the bridge where nine chairs were set in a semi-circle with a tenth chair set apart towards the front viewport, centered on the others. The Captain's seat, no doubt. And designed, of course, to remind them all who the Captain was.

Hunter was going to get tedious fast. Not even Snart was this pretentious on his bad days.

"You know, its almost too bad you had that last chair made," Len spoke up, shit-eating grin on his face. "I'm sure Rathaway would've been comfortable enough sitting on Mick's lap."

"Snart," Mick growled warningly.

The assassin laughed and elbowed Rathaway, "he's got a point, Hartley. You used to be so reserved when we were kids, but I guess what they say is true. Beware the quiet ones."

"For they may grow up very thirsty and gay?" Hartley grinned over at Mick. "You know, if you're... up for it, I could sit on your lap anyway."

Len practically cackled with delight over Rathaway's innuendo filled pun. Mick wanted to cover his face. How the hell did he wind up surrounding himself with people who loved awful puns so much?

"The chairs' restraints only allow for one person in a chair," Hunter interrupted sharply.

"Restraints, huh?" Mick couldn't help himself. He exchanged a smirk with Rathaway.

"Please be seated." Hunter sounded absolutely desperate to keep anyone from making the obligatory 'sounds kinky' comment.

Assassin chick made it anyway.

Haircut was giggling helplessly as they all settled into their chairs and Hunter gave a short spiel on the side effects of time travel that Mick didn't really pay much attention to. Mostly because he's thinking about how boring this trip would've been if Rathaway hadn't sashayed his way onto the roof the other night.

**Author's Note:**

> Hartley keeps calling other people dramatic and melodramatic here, but he's totally got 0 room to talk with all his own dramatics. :)
> 
> Anyway, next time there will be bar brawls and Jax wishing he'd stayed on the Waverider after all.


End file.
